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Reassurance: October, 1831
In the morning, no one says much of anything and everything is awkward until Aimery has dressed and left. Audric has something of a nervous smile, as though he is cheerful but unwilling to show it too clearly. He sits in his chair and pretends to read for a little while before he looks up and asks, hesitantly, "That wasn't awful?" Julien is quiet for a minute, while he finishes getting dressed. "...No." Audric nods. "All right. Good." He looks at the book again, but his smile relaxes into a grin. "I don't--" Julien begins, and breaks off, turning away to tug the bedclothes into some semblance of order. Audric looks up again, frowning. "What? What's wrong?" Julien is blushing rather vividly. "Don't think we should make a habit of it, that's all." Audric blushes, too. "I wasn't going to suggest that. But --" he bites his lip. "But it wasn't unpleasant?" "No," in an uncharacteristic undertone. "All right," again, doubtfully. "I mean -- I didn't think it was terrible, but I didn't -- didn't know what you'd think." "I know what you thought." On another morning, it might be sharp, but today is different; Julien's tone is mild, even, perhaps, amused. "It was fairly evident." Audric blushes again. "I'm sorry." Julien turns, catches his arms, kisses him lingeringly. "Why?" "Oh --" It takes a moment for him to come up with the right words. "Because -- I was afraid you were uncomfortable. I -- all right." He stands and embraces Julien. "Thank you, beloved." "Only in spots." Julien has never been one to smile easily, and less so of late; he does not smile now, but there is decided warmth in his eyes, when he pulls back to look at Audric. "It's all right, love." Audric touches his cheek lightly. "God, you're beautiful when you're happy." And before Julien can object to this, he kisses him. Julien's laughter gets lost in the kiss. His fingers tangle gently in Audric's hair. Audric breaks the kiss after a long interval and sighs happily. "You're wonderful." "I am not," but it's idle, more from habit than irritation. Certainly he does not pull away. Audric strokes his hair. "I have evidence to support my claim, chéri." Julien leans on his shoulder for a minute. "Nonsense." "And a witness," softly. "Audric!" hiding his face. "I'm sorry," immediately. "Forgive me." "You have no shame," but Julien softens this judgment with another kiss. "I --" He finishes the apology several moments after it began. "I'm sorry. I won't tease you about it anymore. I won't mention it, I promise." Audric looks away from him. "I just--" Julien has gone scarlet again. "As long as you don't mention it to -- to other people." Audric's fingers tighten on his sleeve. "I said I won't mention it, and I won't." Julien embraces him again. "Don't be upset with me today." "I'm not," Audric mumbles. "That's the last thing I am. I just -- I don't want you to regret it. At all." "I don't," Julien admits after a moment. "If you're sure --" "I'm sure," kissing him again. "I-- yes." "But --" still a little tentatively, but less as though Julien is about to scream, "you don't want to make a habit of it." Julien gives him a faintly irked glance. "No. That doesn't mean I--" he falters. Audric touches his hair. "That you what?" gently. "Minded," somewhat muffled in Audric's shirt. "Chéri --" Audric sighs. "Mm?" "I love you," after a pause that suggests that might not have been his original thought. "I love you, too." Julien settles closer. "Thank you." "Surely you knew that," amused again. "Yes. But you knew what I meant. -- Come to bed with me, love." "Audric," Julien protests, but, improbably, he is laughing again. "We just got up." "I know, but I want to hold you." "Aren't you?" teasing. "Yes, but in ten minutes I'll want to let you go unless we lie down. Please?" Julien kisses him. "All right." Audric lets him go very briefly. "Besides, I doubt I could convince you to take your shirt off unless we went to bed." Julien colors. "No. It's too cold for that." He sits on the edge of the bed. "I know," helping him with the buttons. "But -- but that's what blankets are for." "I suppose so," returning the favor. Audric kisses his neck lightly. "You never cease to amaze me." Julien shivers. "For heaven's sake. What have I done now?" Audric beams at him. "You've forgotten so soon?" "Audric." But his hands are under Audric's shirt, caressing, and he does not sound particularly outraged. "Not -- oh, God, love. Not that, really -- just that you let it happen." "Was lovely," Julien confesses, breathless, against his shoulder. "Really?" with the joy of a small boy just told he's going to get his very own pony for Christmas. He nods, and attempts to cover his embarrassment with a flurry of kisses. Audric fouls this plan somewhat with a constant murmur of endearments. After a few moments, he embraces Julien. "Bedclothes, dearest." "All right," fuzzily. Once they are situated in a manner that prevents goosebumps, Audric spends a little more time grinning at Julien. Julien buries his face in the pillow. "Don't look so smug." "Oh, was that what I was doing? I was attempting something more like overwhelmingly in love." "I love you, too." He slides an arm around Audric's waist. Audric embraces him. "I know. Believe me, I know."
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